The map has two axes
The vertical axis measures
authority
The horizontal axis measures
closeness
The inner circle defines the
boundaries of healthy functioning
The outer circle defines the
unhealthy boundaries of severe malfunction
At each corner of the map is a
brief description of families with particular combinations of unhealthy
features
The vertical authority axis is a means of measuring the
authority component of a family’s structure
First let’s look at Chaos
·
Chaos is at the top of this map
o
this positioning is arbitrary
o
it could have just as well been at the bottom
o
Chaos just needs to be at the map’s extreme edge
where dysfunction belongs
·
Chaos is a total lack of structure and a total
lack of authority
·
Chaos happens when family members and in particular
the head(s) of the household lose authority, when they experience complete loss
of control
o
For instance a drunken father might lose his
authority while he is intoxicated
·
Chaos also results from a complete lack of
structure
o
A household where bills may or may not be paid,
where chores go undone, without mealtimes, where schedules are absent or
ignored
Next let’s look at Rigid
·
Rigid is the opposite of Chaos so it’s at the
bottom of the map
·
Although it’s opposite of Chaos it’s no better
o
It is just as bad but in the opposite way
·
Rigid is a total lack of any flexibility and any
negotiability with authority
·
Rigid happens when family members particularly
the head(s) of the household are unyielding, unforgiving, unapproachable and
inhumane
o
Many instances of child abuse are the result of
inhumane disciplinary practices
·
Rigid happens when rules proliferate beyond
reason, when rules are often unwritten and contradictory
o
In other words when no matter what you do you
are probably violating some sort of rule and likely to “catch hell” for
breaking a rule
·
Rigid households are emotionally paralyzing they
are paralyzed with structure
o
You may feel like you need permission just to
breathe in these families
Now we shift from vertical to horizontal
The horizontal intimacy axis is a means of measuring the
interpersonal relationships in a family’s structure
First let’s look at Enmeshed
·
The placement of Enmeshed to the right and
Disengaged to the left is arbitrary
·
Enmeshed means a lack of appropriate
interpersonal boundaries
o
An extreme example of enmeshment would be incest
o
Enmeshment can be present without going to this
extreme
·
Every family member has an appropriate role to
play in the family
o
There are parental roles for the parents to play
o
There are various roles for children which may
vary according to age and ability (babies play baby roles, teenagers play
teenage roles)
·
When roles become unclear and confused this is
enmeshment
o
For instance a mother and a daughter sharing a double
date violates important boundaries between parent and child
·
So called role reversal where an adult child
cares for his or her parent is not generally a violation of boundaries
o
Caring for a person can be a way of honoring
them
o
If there is a history of boundary violations
such care may be problematic
·
Enmeshed families tend to have many secrets
·
Enmeshed families may feel like a trap or prison
·
Enmeshed families may lack any personal privacy
Now let’s look at Disengaged
·
Disengaged is the opposite of Enmeshed but it is
no better
·
Disengaged means lack of connection
o
An extreme example would be abandonment of a
newborn baby
o
Disengagement can occur without being this
extreme
·
When family members particularly parents abandon
their appropriate roles Disengagement is the result
o
For instance if a parent repeatedly fails to
attend his (or her) child’s recital or game or other significant event the
child may feel unloved by or disconnected from the parent (they feel abandoned)
·
Disengaged families lack traditions and rituals
·
In disengaged families the family members may
completely ignore each other
·
Disengaged families do not show genuine care or
concern for family members
·
As adults members may lose track of each other
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